It might be hard for you to imagine now, but as a young child, I can bet that you always knew what you wanted.
To get what you wanted, you naturally expressed yourself through crying, sounds, words, gestures and body language.
And if you didn’t need adult support to get what you wanted, you just did what you felt like doing in the moment!
Without judging or analysing yourself, or your latest creations!
Without worrying about the consequences or what others would think of you.
Because you hadn’t learnt to judge yourself or worry about those things!
You were fully present in the moment, not stuck in your head, not dwelling in the past or future.
Until of course, you began obeying instructions and advice from adults such as:
‘Don’t do that.’
‘No, you’re not allowed that.’
‘Don’t be silly.’
‘You need to do it like this.’
‘You need to be more like this.’
‘You need to follow the rules or there’ll be a punishment.’
And so the seeds of worry and judgement were planted!
This likely got reinforced whenever you saw your siblings or peers get told off when they didn’t follow the rules.
Now I am not saying that as children we should be able to do whatever we want, whenever we want. Of course we need to learn certain rules for our safety and to fit in socially…
But I think that for some of us, especially more sensitive types or those of us who were directly or indirectly made to feel like we weren’t good enough, there can be some sad consequences as we get older.
- We lose touch with our own intuition – we can’t hear it or we can’t trust it
- We struggle to make decisions on our own in case we make the wrong one and let ourselves or someone else down, so we constantly seek approval and advice from others
- We’re afraid to take risks even when it’s a risk that could lead to experiencing or achieving what we really want
- We’re afraid to speak up; to share our thoughts, feelings and ideas, in case we say wrong thing, get judged, cause conflict or disagreement…
- We’re afraid to take initiative; to make the first move without needing permission
I think we can be so used to following rules, instructions and advice from others (especially when we lack self-confidence), that we forget how to be the leader of our own lives.
You might think you could never call yourself a leader because it’s not the type of role you identify with.
I used to feel the same.
But now, not only am I consciously practising being the leader of my own life once again, through strengthening my intuition and self-trust each day…
I am also a leader for others; for my tribe, readers and clients.
Not in an ‘I have all the answers, so copy me’ type of way…
But in an ‘I’d like to share my experiences and insights with you, to show you what’s possible and to empower you to find and speak your truth’ kind of way.
A few years ago, being a leader for others in this way was not even on my radar. I wouldn’t have believed I was capable of it, let alone enjoy it!
Yet here I am; proof that despite how limited we can by our identities and the beliefs we have about ourselves…
They are not set in stone.
We can reprogram our beliefs and change our perspectives to support and empower us to become who we really want to become!
It all starts with tuning in to what it is that you would really love to do, be or have (forgetting all excuses, fears and doubts).
Because when you do that, you are connecting to pure truth – what feels true for you in the moment – and there’s no arguing with that. There’s no right or wrong.
What feels true for you can change over time, and that’s totally OK.
Giving yourself this permission to dream and to get really clear on what you want deep down, is the first step to bringing those dreams into reality.
Of course once you’ve got that clarity, there are more important steps to be taken – this is something I help women with in the final part of my signature programme, The Confident Introvert.
If you’re interested in learning more about the programme, don’t hesitate to reach out and we’ll explore together if it’s a good fit for you! You can message me here or book a complimentary Confidence Breakthrough Call with me directly.
In the meantime, where can you step more into your power and claim your rightful place as leader of your own life?